Slightly Off-Balance

 As I mentioned yesterday, I love lists and have a few forming in my head about my kids.  As the saying goes, kids say the darndest things.  My kids are no exception.  Sometimes they stop me in my tracks with their insight or absurdity.  They make me laugh, scream and cry with their remarks.  Here is a list of my favorites:

1. Mom, I think the Grinch is mean because he has no friends.  So I’ll be his friend and then he will be nice. 
2. Mommy, if I use my magic wand, I can turn my vagina into a penis
3. I like red wine better than white
4. Mom, do you think I can have a playdate at charity’s house so I can play with my old toys?
5. Thank you for a magical day mommy.
6. She scratched me because I stopped her from trying to go tell on me.
7. Mommy, I put all my stuffed animals in your bed so you would feel better
8. Fuck this game*
9. Don’t tell me I can’t marry my brother
10. No fair that there is a mother’s day and father’s day, what about kids day?! (Everyday is kids day in this house!)

What is the funniest, craziest or most heart-warming thing your child has said? 

*When my son was about 3 1/2 we were playing a board game and he was losing.  He dropped the F-bomb to the shock of my husband and I.  We quickly explained that his language was not okay and asked where did he hear that.  He looked innocently at my husband and said, “From you dad, you say it all the time”!  My husband was practically crying, trying to suppress his laughter, he was also impressed that our son had used it in the proper context.