Home > Humor, Parenting > 10 Signs You Might Be Crazy

10 Signs You Might Be Crazy

I have never claimed to be balanced.  I never pretend to have it all figured out.  I admit that I am usually barely treading wine.  But through personal experience observation I have devised a checklist to determine if one is truly nuts…

  1. You think you can finally get caught up on your to-do list with one really productive day ever.
  2. You contemplate a puppy, another baby, a new car and a planning a vacation on the same day.
  3. You can’t find your cell phone, so you ask a friend to call you.  When you hear it ringing on your person, you ask the friend to hold their ear to your body to help figure out which pocket you put your phone in.
  4. You think that new Justin Bieber movie would be good for date night.
  5. You use your mom voice when talking to yourself.
  6. When you can’t find a sitter you convince yourself that the kids would be angels if you take them with you wine tasting.
  7. You ask your husband to get a vasectomy and hold on to baby gear just in case.
  8. You think the bright side of canceling a dinner date with your husband is that you get to clean behind the refrigerator.
  9. You think that your 6-year-old and 3-year-old are now mature enough to accompany you clothes shopping without causing a dismembered mannequin.
  10. You are planning to give up all alcohol and all sweets for Lent.

If you have experienced any of the above, pour yourself a glass of wine (or beer or chocolate milk) and join me at the Funny Farm.

Disclaimer: I am not a psychologist, tarot card reader, bartender or other professional.  This post is for entertainment only and should not be used to treat a mental health condition or ridicule its writer.  If you think you might really be crazy, seek professional help, then give them my address.

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  1. February 18, 2011 at 6:38 am

    It’s not even 10am and I yearn to tread wine…save me a seat at the funny farm…

    • February 18, 2011 at 7:01 am

      Lori, my dear, you have a seat at the head of the table (There’e more wine at the head of table).

  2. February 18, 2011 at 6:47 am

    I was nodding a bit too much at the list.. You might have company there..

    • February 18, 2011 at 7:01 am

      Kelly – we’ll have fun together.

  3. February 18, 2011 at 6:49 am

    I actually took a date to the movie “The Breakup”…that was probably not the most sane move.

    • February 18, 2011 at 7:01 am

      Nathan – I think your move was genius. A little reverse pyschology dating testing.

  4. February 18, 2011 at 6:51 am

    This was so wonderful.

    I, also, have looked forward to an evening at home for putting away the laundry.

  5. February 18, 2011 at 6:57 am

    I have an abundance of ice cream, cake mixes, alcohol, beer, (I’ll need to buy wine but live minutes from trader joes) and my children go to bed early and sleep hard. I have a big couch for which you can have your ‘therapy’ I also have a big screen tv to which I can show you movies involving real men (not teenagers with bad hair)- oh yeah- I’m not catholic, so I don’t give things up. Ever. Crazy is absolutely acceptable in this household…come join me.

    • February 18, 2011 at 6:59 am

      Jamie – I am packing as we speak! Boy are you going to regret this… 😉

  6. bearlover
    February 18, 2011 at 7:17 am

    I think your husband is wonderful. Oh ooops I may have commented on the wrong post. =)

    • February 18, 2011 at 7:23 am

      Sarah – Flattering my husband will get you nowhere! Who am I kidding?! You’ll get all the free wine you want. Your evil plan has worked!

  7. February 18, 2011 at 8:52 am

    Oh my – I am so so so guilty of number two. Whenever anything gets a little LESS COMLETELY CHAOTIC, I look for the easiest way to throw our family back into total disarray.

    Yep. Dogs. Babies. Cars. Moves. Brilliant.

    • February 22, 2011 at 9:47 am

      Julie – Apparently, we are so amazing that we feel the need to give ourselves an extra challenge so others can be on par with us. Or, no, we’re just crazy.

  8. February 18, 2011 at 9:04 am

    I’m totally hanging out in the loony bin with you. We’ll be wonky and barely sane together.

    • February 22, 2011 at 9:48 am

      Mads – I have a room reserved for you – the Presidential Suite actually, because having a newborn, will make you a special blend of crazy!

  9. February 18, 2011 at 3:40 pm

    Paige, that’s 10 out of 10 for me. I’ll be the first patient admitted to your facility.

    • February 22, 2011 at 9:49 am

      Sendie – we will be awaiting your arrival!

  10. February 18, 2011 at 4:40 pm

    Officially a crazie, this is uber cool. I love your sense of humor

    • February 22, 2011 at 9:49 am

      Thanks Blessing! Crazy is safe in numbers!

  11. February 18, 2011 at 4:43 pm

    Pfft. People get all bent out of shape because some plastic woman is in 18 pieces.

    Amateurs.

    • February 22, 2011 at 9:49 am

      Lori – they just don’t appreciate his artistic genius!

  12. February 21, 2011 at 6:27 am

    I’m fully aware of my questionable sanity, but one cleans BEHIND the refrigerator? Really?

    • February 22, 2011 at 9:51 am

      John, ONLY becase there was a funny smell coming from it. But I admit, I have cleaning OCD and now I may make this a semi-annual event.

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