Slightly Off-Balance

I was on the phone with a friend last week and she was frustrated.  Her husband was trying to help out by making bacon, but he was burning it.  I teased her by saying, you can’t ask him to be more helpful and then criticize him when he tries.  She disagreed. 🙂

This sparked a conversation of the “life rules”.  The ones that we want others to follow, but that we occasionally want to break, such as ‘don’t ask for help then criticize it’.  So I have decided to publish in writing a “new” set of life rules to use at your discretion when you need life to work in your favor:

1. Life IS fair.  This means that if something is unfair, you have the right to be upset, cranky and consume chocolate and wine.
2. You CAN have your cake and eat it too.  Especially if you wash it down with wine.
3. You CAN look a gift horse in the mouth. If you don’t like the gift or the strings attached to it.
4. Treats others as you would like to treat them. Especially when you’re mad at them, they deserve it or you have run out of chocolate and wine.
5. A penny saved is a penny wasted… if there is a sale on shoes!
6. Good things come to those who DON’T wait.  Carpe diem baby, make things happen, take action!
7. If you want something done, don’t give it to a busy person.  I am a busy person and can’t handle anymore.  Why should the people who aren’t busy get a pass?

And a few that are perfect just the way they are…

1. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned – Two words: Lorena Bobbit.
2. Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we die – Even if we know we will live for years, eat, drink and be merry!
3. Tomorrow is another day – which means I have another opportunity to be a better mom demonstrate that I am enough.

What other life rules do you love or need revised?